After a ridiculously long hiatus I am finally back behind the keyboard to expound upon you my overwhelmingly perverse addiction to the iPhone and all of it’s glorious apps. Have no fear, during my absence I continued to download an obnoxious plethora and am once again prepared to guide you to salvation.
Back in my much younger years I fancied myself to be a rock star. But let’s face it, this takes talent, hard work, and often times joining up with a group of douchebags who always manage to piss you off by either stealing your cigarettes, drinking all your beer, or just plain opening up there gaping holes and spouting out idiocy. I lack the first two attributes, and go out of my way to avoid the third so what was I to do? That’s right. Enter the iPhone.
This is hands down my absolute favorite app on my iPhone. Created by the Gods at Sonosaurus, this gem is essential for all musicians. Don’t despair however, if the only musical talent you possess is the ability to belch the “Star Spangled Banner”, or fart on beat to Lady Gaga’s “Poker Face.” This app will have you sounding like you have the talent of Yngwie Malmsteen in seconds. The sound quality of all the instruments is mind blowing, then add the fact that Jordan Rudess the quintessential keyboard player for Dream Theater has contributed a couple of his own sounds to the mix should have you convinced that this app is one bad-ass mutha fucka. You get over 30 high-quality real instruments and hundreds of included scales plus there are even more sounds and loops you can download for FREE!. The app sells for $6.99 in the app store, and if you’re like me who has become “that guy” who bitches if an app is over $.99, trust me on this one, I would pay 100 times more than that for only half of what this app does. ThumbJam contains so many features it would be impossible for me to include them all here so to immerse yourself in the sheer badassedness of this app and all of it’s amazing features you must check out their website.
Always wanted to put music to those creative lyrics you wrote about all your pent up teenage angst, or about that girls “big juicy booty?” Well look no further my friends, this app uses some ridiculously advanced technology to do just that! I’ll admit I was tentative at first in viewing it’s $2.99 price tag (as stated above, I can be a real cheap-o when it comes to buying apps) but this app is worth every penny, and then some. Don’t worry if when you sing it sounds like a flock of geese getting anally impaled by a tuba either, because this app also offers pitch correction. Just open it up, hit the red record button and start your warbling.
It gives you several different “styles” for the background music. These include: E Piano Pop, Rhythm Synth Pop, Dub Tone, Underground Rap, Tasty Breaks Rap, and Dirty South Rap. I hope in the future they will include more but for right now, I promise these won’t disappoint. Especially if you’re using the app the same way I am….to be an idiot.
Once you have recorded your masterpiece you can listen to it in each of the different styles listed above. Then you can save it to your own personal library of songs:
From there, feel free to A) Listen to it over and over again B) Post it to your Facebook news feed, or a friends Facebook wall C) Post it to your Twitter account D) Post it to Ladida.me so perfect strangers can hear your epic anthem or E) Email it as a link or an attachment.
So go ahead and free your creative juices with no need to possess even a minute inkling of some sort of skill or talent. Ladida will take care of you.
These are just two of several apps I have stumbled upon that allow you to unleash the musically creative beast trapped inside of you or at the very least apps that will keep you and all your drunken friends entertained when you grow bored watching streaming movies on Netflix.
Check back in a few days when I review the Glee app and a seriously awesome app called PipeKeys….til then.
